My conventional options are simple and based on the idea that getting to know each other is more the point than not.

The sweet spot? Let’s start with a cocktail or two, building that a little bubble that’s just us. Then we walk down the hall and shut the door, usually laughing, with the Do Not Disturb sign out. Now truly in our own world, satisfying pleasure can be created, followed by sweet afterglow. This is the escape you’ve been needing, a little rejuvenating me-time that’s tailor-made for the male psyche.

Even better? A lingering dinner, bonding over food, often getting to mutually experience dishes we haven’t had before. The exploration begins with pre-dinner cocktails, ending later with soft music and soft sheets, one light illuminating the room, city lights outside the window. Clocks don’t exist in this world at all, neither do co-worker’s interrupting phone calls, traffic, or much of anything to remind you of the usual daily grind.

Lunch just doesn’t hit the same way, though a getaway in the middle of the day still has appeal, precisely because you’re playing hooky from your desk and phone calls. And it’s early enough that whoever leaves first won’t have to battle traffic.